I Remember, I Remember
Unspent Memories
Since the speaker has no strange or significant memories to share with his companion, he imagines a list of intriguing stories that did not happen. These figments move from his early years in the “garden” and his awkward teenage experiences to his unremarkable work in Coventry’s “offices”.
The fourth verse introduces the “first” story. Instead of describing how he played in his “garden”, he alludes to a charming narrative where he was able to “invent blinding theologies of flowers and fruits”. Apparently, his brilliant investigation into the natural world and divine truth was dazzling. The alliteration of /f/ in “flowers” and “fruits”, which both denote fertility, makes his discoveries seem even more incredible.
The speaker also mentions he “wasn’t spoken to by an old hat”. An “old hat” which can talk sounds fantastical and is a good description of a villainous character from a child’s perspective, especially since the phrase is used to describe something that is old and worn-out. The “splendid family” might refer to friendly neighbours who offer comfort and support when he feels “depressed”.
These three images could easily be found in the sentimental plots of children’s literature. However, by focusing on the absence of these wonderful events, made clear by the use of the negative adverbs “not” and “never”, Larkin reveals his early days in Coventry were very mundane and uneventful.
Unspent Adolescence
Larkin marks the shift from the innocence of childhood into his unfulfilling teenage years through the enjambment separating the “splendid family” and the “depressed” speaker in the next verse. The alliteration of /b/ and the clipped syntax of “the boys all biceps” creates a bitter tone and conveys his strong feelings of physical inadequacy. The half-rhyming of the terse “the girls all chest” with “depressed” from the previous line suggests his exciting desires were not satisfied.
Learning to drive is an important turning point in our lives because it offers the freedom and independence to explore our world. The reference to “their comic Ford” sounds quite specific but a Ford is a common car so the image remains universal. However, the possessive pronoun “their” suggests Larkin was even excluded from this rite of passage.
Adolescence is also a time when we struggle with our identity because of the different roles we are expected to play in our lives. However, the poet mocks his desire to find a private space on “their farm” where he could be “really myself”. The inverted commas draw attention to his sarcasm and, again, the third-person pronoun “their” suggests no real sense of belonging.
At the end of the fifth verse, Larkin describes the awkward moment out on the wild “bracken” when he was “determined” to lie down with a young woman and “go through with it”. The verb “trembling” conveys his excitement and fear while he tries to maintain his composure. Of course, the adverb “never” reminds the reader that this clumsy and romantic moment on one of Coventry’s heaths did not happen. There was no “burning mist”.
Note how each image moves further away from his home. This physical distance suggests a gradual emotional break from his family. The tone of the details also shifts from the innocent tales of childhood to the sexual angst of a teenager. Note the difference between the beautiful “flowers” and “fruits” compared to the common “bracken” at the end of this sequence. It seems Larkin’s world became less desirable.
Roots
In the third verse, the speaker’s “friend” asks if Coventry was where he had his “roots”. This well-used metaphor compares our influential formative years to the way the roots fasten a plant in the ground and help sustain its growth. However, unimpressed by the question, Larkin wants to “retort” that the city was “just” where he “started”, suggesting nothing was important enough to keep him there.
In fact, he struggles to recognise Coventry despite it being “mine” for “so long”. Looking at the station, he “wasn’t even clear which side was which” and questions if this was the platform his family had “annually departed” for their “hols”.
Many aspects of the poem reinforce the theme of movement and change.
A train journey is an obvious signifier of the passage of time and the changes it brings because we travel from one station to another with the final destination always up ahead. Larkin reinforces this progress by the “whistle” sounding and how “things moved”. When he imagines his “unspent” childhood, the train has already left the station and he will be able to “show” his companion the insignificant “bracken” and “those offices” where he worked.
Comprehension Questions
- What words and phrases in the first verse suggest the speaker rarely passes through Coventry?
- How do you think the speaker felt when he “squinnied” out the window to see if he recognised anything in the station?
- In your own words, describe what speaker meant by the phrase “childhood was unspent”.
- How does the poet convey the innocence of early childhood in the fourth verse?
- The speaker then imagines moments from his adolescence. How do you think he really felt during this time?
- How do you think the speaker felt when he worked in “those offices”?
- What is the speaker’s conclusion about the past at the end of the poem?
- Look back through the poem. How does Larkn create sense of time and progress?
- What do you think is the overall mood of the poem?